Why Can't I Breathe? - SCN
Aug. 13th, 2003 03:49 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
morrigirlHello Me,
Don't mind the title. Liz Phair is on VH1 right now.
Well, I have officially made the jump to livejournal. All the really juicy, contemplative entries are going in there now.
I always make it a point to write a long blubbery final entry whenever I finish a journal. Looks like it's time to put one in here.
I've never kept a journal for a year and a half straight. Maybe it was having an audience, maybe it was the lack of writers cramp that accompanies typing, I dunno, but something about this journal kept me going. I felt a stronger need to write in here than I ever have in any of my written journals.
One could easily attribute that to the major depressive relapse I had during the construction of this journal. That makes you stand out more than any other, do you know that? This journal saw me through my first depressive episode that required in patient hospitalization. It saw me through the suicide of a loved one. Saw me though the many theater productions I threw myself into in order to keep my mind off Kirk. I'd be lying if I didn't admit this journal has made a lasting impact on my psyche.
It has been a reprieve on many lonely nights when I've sat alone in my room with nothing but the computer to console me. I've poured my guts out in here. And for the most part, my thoughts and feelings have been respected by my readership, so thank you for that.
Worry not though, I'll still be around. Maybe not on the forums, or in the diaries, but I'll be floating about the site looking for and speaking to people I care about.
And I guess...those are the last words I have to say.
Take care all, thank you for letting me make my home here for a little while.
Love always,
Carla
Don't mind the title. Liz Phair is on VH1 right now.
Well, I have officially made the jump to livejournal. All the really juicy, contemplative entries are going in there now.
I always make it a point to write a long blubbery final entry whenever I finish a journal. Looks like it's time to put one in here.
I've never kept a journal for a year and a half straight. Maybe it was having an audience, maybe it was the lack of writers cramp that accompanies typing, I dunno, but something about this journal kept me going. I felt a stronger need to write in here than I ever have in any of my written journals.
One could easily attribute that to the major depressive relapse I had during the construction of this journal. That makes you stand out more than any other, do you know that? This journal saw me through my first depressive episode that required in patient hospitalization. It saw me through the suicide of a loved one. Saw me though the many theater productions I threw myself into in order to keep my mind off Kirk. I'd be lying if I didn't admit this journal has made a lasting impact on my psyche.
It has been a reprieve on many lonely nights when I've sat alone in my room with nothing but the computer to console me. I've poured my guts out in here. And for the most part, my thoughts and feelings have been respected by my readership, so thank you for that.
Worry not though, I'll still be around. Maybe not on the forums, or in the diaries, but I'll be floating about the site looking for and speaking to people I care about.
And I guess...those are the last words I have to say.
Take care all, thank you for letting me make my home here for a little while.
Love always,
Carla
