morrigirl: (DarkCrystal)

My Love is Vengeance That's Never Free

Prune danish? Those must be men from Jupiter!

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Created on 2016-12-30 07:12:18 (#2660920), last updated 2016-12-30 (38 weeks ago)

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Location:New York, United States of America
I'm just a short little Italian girl born and bred in New York City amid actors, writers, and theatre enthusiasts. Went to college in the Mid-West and majored in creative writing with the goal of becoming a famous author someday. That hasn't quite panned out. Instead, I'm a mild mannered administrative assistant by day, reclusive poet by night. On good days, nice editors from awesome literary magazines decide to publish my poetry. While waiting for their emails I play video games and watch cop dramas on television.

What the masses have to say:

"I thought to myself, "What song would Carla sing in her soul?" and there was no answer. So I slept on it. And when I slept on it, I had a Dream. In this dream, you're sitting down at a cafe in Manhattan with some guy in a business suit, face unclear, and he gets down on his knee, and opens a tiny box- within it is a ring. That's when the Punk/Ska music starts blarin' right up! You put one foot upon his chest, push him back onto the ground, and say "I beg your pardon! I never promised you a rose garden!" and then you turn around and pick up the microphone in the ska band and sing the rest of that song. You had your own punk/ska cover music video. It was a rockin' dream! So that's your song." - greenblackevil

"Carla-- or The Master, as her followers know her-- lives in a gigantic warehouse-turned-compound with the members of her Holy Fuck cult in the backwoods of Montana. FBI agents have surrounded the compound for 12 days, but are afraid to take any aggressive action-- rumor has it that Carla has a stockpile of WMDs under her bed, and authorities fear the possibility of nuclear fallout. Every month on the full moon, Carla holds a ceremony in a shed adjoining the compound "initiating" any boys or girls who have turned 14 in the course of the month into her cult; outsiders cannot be sure what this ritual entails, but the sounds of whips cracking, livestock bellowing, and what sound like bad midget porn set to a soundtrack of 1970s funk music can be heard by anyone within a 50-mile radius of the compound." - starstealingirl

Remember that time we went to that awesome gay bar in Galesburg? You were dressed up as a sort of Cher meets Stevie Nicks, and I was the twisted love child of Elvis and Pee Wee Herman. Remember how all the chicks hit on you, after you table-danced topless? I was so jealous. I never knew you could dance like that. And then, the next thing I knew was that a coterie of gay men had declared you their queen and were lavishing attention and sexual favors upon you. Do you remember when the power went dead and the tornado sirens went off? I think you had something like 17 orgasms while being snuggled and protected by your group of Carla lovers. The Carla love in the air protected that beautiful gay bar and sent that twister all the way 'cross town. I think it flattened the high school or something instead." - gender_euphoric

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