Bothering Me Again
Jun. 2nd, 2002 05:41 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
morrigirlOkay, here is a question that I have been pondering quite a bit this year, what with the two major break ups I've been through and all, is it at all possible for a depressed person to find love?
I've read book after book, article after article, advising depressed people not to get involved in relationships and conversely, for people not to get romantically involved with a depressed person. I understand the reasoning behind this advice. A depressed person needs time to heal, to love themselves, to work out their issues. Furthermore it is generally noted that someone who is depressed is not in any emotional state to truly care for another person. If one half of a couple is depressed normally neither person can have their needs met.
But if one is chronic, if one is doomed to live a life full of emotional trials and relapses how can anyone love them? With all this advice not to get involved with a depressed person, are the chronically depressed doomed to live loveless lives? Do depressed people not deserve to be involved in romantic relationships? Does our disease make us totally unlovable?
My experience would say yes, and I'm not trying to put myself down by saying that. It's just a fact. No one I have been involved with has ever been able to deal with my dark side, no one has ever been willing to make the effort. From my end it looks like the stigma of depression along with the effort it takes to love someone with a chronic disease makes depressives doomed to lives without real love relationships.
Is this true? Is there no hope? Should I just give up now and join a nunnery? Or are there people out there who would not be daunted by the task of loving a diseased person?
If anyone has the answer, I would love to hear it: morpheus620@hotmail.com
I've read book after book, article after article, advising depressed people not to get involved in relationships and conversely, for people not to get romantically involved with a depressed person. I understand the reasoning behind this advice. A depressed person needs time to heal, to love themselves, to work out their issues. Furthermore it is generally noted that someone who is depressed is not in any emotional state to truly care for another person. If one half of a couple is depressed normally neither person can have their needs met.
But if one is chronic, if one is doomed to live a life full of emotional trials and relapses how can anyone love them? With all this advice not to get involved with a depressed person, are the chronically depressed doomed to live loveless lives? Do depressed people not deserve to be involved in romantic relationships? Does our disease make us totally unlovable?
My experience would say yes, and I'm not trying to put myself down by saying that. It's just a fact. No one I have been involved with has ever been able to deal with my dark side, no one has ever been willing to make the effort. From my end it looks like the stigma of depression along with the effort it takes to love someone with a chronic disease makes depressives doomed to lives without real love relationships.
Is this true? Is there no hope? Should I just give up now and join a nunnery? Or are there people out there who would not be daunted by the task of loving a diseased person?
If anyone has the answer, I would love to hear it: morpheus620@hotmail.com
