The End is Near - SCN

I wish I could tell them. I wish I could tell Mike, Abby, Allie, and Stesha that none of this is important. That it will fade out and in a year, two years, they won't feel the pain or the hurt or the longing or the love anymore. In ten years they won't even reember the names of anyone on this site. I wish I could tell them, but they can't be told. Because experential learning is the key to growth. We gotta fall and we gotta do it willingly. That's life.

The end is near. I've already written 3 entries today on my alternate journal. For some reason I just didn't want to put them here. They...didn't feel like they'd fit. All day I've just wanted to write in my new journal, so that's what I've been doing. I like it. I like it knowing that no one is reading it but me. I like knowing that my secrets are finally secret for good. No friends, no family, not even strangers reading my thoughts.

In the beginning having a public journal was very freeing. But now I'm rediscovering the freedom of secrecy and anonymity which is very fitting as I head back to the city to become another nameless face once again.

Going for the Jugular - SCN

IT'S FUCKING GORGEOUS OUTSIDE!!! WHERE THE HELL IS MY FLUNK DAY!!!!!!

TODAY WOULD HAVE BEEN PERFECT!!! WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT IS WRONG WITH THIS SCHOOL!!! ARE THEY DAFT?

I am so ready to hurt people. I am ready to kill and maim because shit just keeps getting worse. I keep anticipating Flunk Day and staying up late and blowing off classes and then the school fucks me all up by not having it on the days when it would be most auspicious!!!

I'm pissed at everyone. I'm pissed at my friends, at my school, at my classes, at my teachers, at myself, at my online friends, at the world, at Republicans, at George Dubya Bush, that's right, because I know if I tried hard enough I could blame this year's late Flunk Day on him!!! After all, everything else is his fault, right? The ten plus years and God knows how many TRILLIONS of dollars for the post war occupation of Iraq, the shit house economy, the huge tax cut for the rich which will subsequently land us in MILLIONS of dollars in debt not to mention force the government to cut back on funding for public outreach programs. It's all his fault. Why should Flunk Day be any different?

I so desperately need an aluminum bat right about now. Or, no, better yet, Wolverine claws. YES!!! Then I could just walk down the street slashing random strangers which is exactly what I think I need in order to get all this pent up fucking aggression out!!!!!

*beats moniter into oblivion*